How to love men
Every year on November 19 in the world celebrated International Men's Day. We decided to recall the beautiful half of humanity, how to love men, and have chosen for this 10 amazing in its simplicity and genius tips from psychologist Natalya Belousova. We hope to men like our small gift
Every moment remember what the purpose of your relationship with a man
In normal people, the purpose of the relationship - to provide maximum comfort for a long time, that is, do yourself and your partner happy. Here and repeat it to yourself every time you have to hunt to teach, to heal, to criticize your man, take it out on him during PMS, violently jealous, try to find out about his leisure, to express an opinion about his friends, arguing about politics, religion and the color of his pants. Is it worth your rightness or interest in a particular situation of peace and joy, which you deprive a partner?
Keep in mind that about two-thirds of the sources of conflict are described by the scheme "a woman came up with the problem of the blue and fanned lack of response to her man to the extent of the tragedy."
If he is not worth praise and does everything askew, what the hell do you do next with this loser? Go away, not to prolong the agony for each other, see point 1. Do not be for him grumpy mother, a strict boss, capricious daughter - all of these incarnations take only positive components:. A constant but unobtrusive care, interest in his growth, his admiration for the steepness .
Many a child heard the expression, "to praise - has deteriorated," so that's a myth, an adult sane man to praise is not possible, it has a self-strap. And praise - not to flatter, it means to look at him with a desire to see the good. Enjoy all the praise, do not take it for service you - there are more intelligent people with whom he chooses to communicate.
Do not humiliate him, and not on the people skandalte
Showdown in public places - a taboo, because the public image of respectability and reliability is much more important for men than for women, which in the current social system can still afford to be frivolous beautiful little fool.
When the "half" the most trusted person, begins to undermine the authority of the men in front of his friends, colleagues or the crowd in the subway, it is perceived as a stab in the back. This often forgiven, but never forgotten. To make a man lose face - one of the greatest strategic blunders woman in a relationship. You do the call, do not hesitate. So wait with claims up to the house, along with cool, interpret them, see para. 1.
Do not use appeals to him diminutivov (diminutive epithets)
Vitya, chick, kotinka, hare, and Masya lapulya - it's not your guy who sees himself in a dream. It's as if he began to call you "mother", "friend", "an ordinary Jane" or "supersiski". Presented? Forget about the diminutive suffix permanently, caressing reserved for particularly of successful sex.
support his undertakings, even the most idiotic
When he takes your wedding rings, even a little bit to play on the machines is one thing. And when he is fond of ice fishing, playing the trombone, embroidery cross, biathlon, collecting garden gnomes, sale adzhika own seamer over the Internet - is quite another. The desire to meet with hostility by the new initiatives in the nature of every human being, because any system tends to keep his balance, but then you have to be smarter than nature. Based on a realistic assessment of the maximum possible damage to you personally and obschesemeynomu welfare. You feel sorry for a couple thousand dollars for a loved one happy with the fish, and then you wonder how vehemently he hates your trips to the shoe store? Well, cluttering gnomes hallway and two balconies, and that - that's true, so terrible? Again: if you do not vote and do not support you - it will make someone else, and in this moment you are Depart.
The most breath-taking view - for him and not for meeting classmates
Hunter syndrome is winning, losing interest in the game caught, is peculiar to women no less than men. What you zahomutat it in cohabitation or to tie the knot, it does not mean that he was now in love with you forever. Yes, it's gone, vile and trite, but about half of my male patients complained of facts prenebreganiya woman in their appearance after the relationship entered a stable track.
If he was fascinated by a physicist with gray hair, wearing a brown plaid vest and top-boots worn, he knew what was coming. But once on the wedding photos you blonde curls and a rose, and now bobbed something in a convenient overalls, do not blame me if you cease to be perceived as an attractive female. Especially when you are painting on the corporate parties and buy a new dress and go home a la naturel in the same gentle pastel things (which the male eye perceives as a faded and asexual). It's very simple, but the women do not cease to make that mistake. You do not have to love just the way you are (in fact, you do not have to love a priori, see para. 1).
He - chief. And the point of
Seriously, it's so convenient. The main problem lies in trying to feminists, figuratively speaking, to unload the wagons, when instead you can dance. Does evolution, social attitudes and education in most families, but a man grown for the role of problem solver, a leader, captain and so on. It does not humiliate you, if you do not decide you want to be humiliated. One girl perceives filed arm when leaving the bus as the gallantry, and the other - as an allusion to her inability to jump over a puddle due to physical weakness short legs. It is clear which one enjoys socializing with the opposite sex, and which is suffering from the oppression of the chauvinists. And it's for you to decide which girl to be.
Give him a joy to be strong, act, think and play the first fiddle. Give a man to lead, and the dance work. Let it not always right, you can then quietly fix the situation: even when in fact you are doing the lion's share, if you love your partner - mimic the picture, "you're my hero, I'm just waiting in the wings" there is no trouble. Implement their will to power elsewhere. For example, as gay. They do not care.
Talk about the important things right, without hints
Men understand hints, but more often it hints of other men or are hints that is profitable for them to understand. They (except maybe the Japanese) do not talk about the fact Aesopian language. When your husband wants to sell the customer a party motorcycles, he said: "We have a well-known brand, the warranty period the average for the market, and for the wholesale we will let us remove 7%" and not "faded autumn leaf on a lonely elm that grew up on the hill of dismal and it is time to harness the iron horse reasonable creature, and these places to escape quickly to the south. " Therefore presented in simple, but not globally, not "just say you stopped loving me, huh?", And "I'm tired of your worms to collect ice fishing throughout the home, not for this mother raised me, hire a housekeeper."
Do not put it in the center of his universe and do not ask him to put you in the center of its
I am not referring to genuine concern for each other's needs and the depth of love and demands attention for detail. Half-hour phone calls five times a day about anything annoy almost any man. Psychological dependence on his views of flattering him, but annoying too. Therefore, do not attempt formally to devote their lives, it's great scares and accusations of negligence in conjunction with meaningless emotional manifestations very quickly tired him, but you will be crying and shout "ungrateful, I gave him all of myself."
Let's be honest: all of you, even to herself not needed. And it's just all the more reasonable to offer only the choicest parts.
Learn to prepare delicious
And cook. It is not discussed. Equivalent "is not ready" for your understanding - it is "he brings home less money than she." Well, we have the same equal rights, you're wanted?